Thursday, March 3, 2016

Over the hump.

I had every intention of posting more this week...and then it just wasn't the priority. I've read lots of friends' blogs this week and several of them have talked about their blogs falling to the end of the priority list and I think that's totally okay!! If we all have something to say...say it! If not, let the blogs  sit silent until we do!

I realized this morning since I hadn't posted anything this week, the last post I had up was describing my medical scare and trying to figure my health out. I then thought to myself "self, it's time for a check in!"

Currently, I have gone one full (and glorious) week without a single headache or dizzy spell. I have boiled it down to the supplement I was taking for my mental health. Up until November of 2015 I was taking an anti-depressant. When I wanted to remove that medication, I went back to using St. John's Wort to help with mood stability. Last week when I was trying everything and could not figure out what was happening to my body, I took out all supplements and realized almost instantly that the St. John's Wort was to blame for my symptoms.

I've more recently learned that St. John's Wort is not as reliable as I was once led to believe, because as we all know supplements available in retail stores are not well regulated and St. John's Wort can have many unnecessary and unhealthy additives. Also, the main ingredient in St' John's is known to cause many side effects, some of which include the dizziness and headaches.

I am tempted to go as far as to say that my complex migraine was a result of my body not doing well with the St. John's as well. However, only time will tell me if that's true. It is possible that I get another hemiplegic migraine in a week or a month. We will have to wait and see on that one.

Since removing St. John's Wort from my daily life, I have felt instant relief from both the mid day dizziness and the frequent painful headaches. I have felt my energy bounce back up and am thinking much more sharply. I can't tell if I am struggling mentally and emotionally because of the absence of the supplement, or if it was a placebo effect and now I just "feel" like I am struggling. I have moments where I dislike myself very much and continue to tear myself apart for very unreasonable things. However, I feel well equipped to fight those mental struggles, whereas I was not okay living with the dizziness and headaches.

Because of the health scare and constant confusing, however, the beginning of 2016 has felt chaotic. I have felt completely out of balance, as if I am on a tight rope between two sky scrapers and everything is literally about to come crashing down. I have struggled to feel progress with my fitness. I have struggled to find enjoyment from my career. I have struggled to maintain enough energy to keep up with my toddler. And I have struggled to maintain normalcy.

However, I feel as if I am finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. I think I figured out what was causing me to feel so horrible. I am working on my mental outlook on life. I am slowly catching up with tasks at work and at home. And I have recommitted to my fitness process. This last week I have been cutting (calories) and the dietary changes have shown great promise! I am going to continue to trust the process and be consistent and push forward!

The reason I do want to say all of this in a public manner, is so my community sees that everything we put in our bodies matters. We all understand the importance of nutrition and work on clean eating. But then I see lots of women supplement their diets with pills, pre-workouts, protein bars, etc. All of those things are chemicals and the bottom line is we really don't know what those chemicals are or where they are from!

If you work hard to keep your diet clean, why not keep the medications and supplements clean as well? If you are sensitive to food like I am, you will probably be sensitive to any chemical you ingest as well. I am not saying stop what you're doing, but maybe just be aware and really think of which products you are choosing to use.

Things are finally getting better in this Little Life!!