Over the hump.

I had every intention of posting more this week...and then it just wasn't the priority. I've read lots of friends' blogs this week and several of them have talked about their blogs falling to the end of the priority list and I think that's totally okay!! If we all have something to say...say it! If not, let the blogs  sit silent until we do!

I realized this morning since I hadn't posted anything this week, the last post I had up was describing my medical scare and trying to figure my health out. I then thought to myself "self, it's time for a check in!"

Currently, I have gone one full (and glorious) week without a single headache or dizzy spell. I have boiled it down to the supplement I was taking for my mental health. Up until November of 2015 I was taking an anti-depressant. When I wanted to remove that medication, I went back to using St. John's Wort to help with mood stability. Last week when I was trying everything and could not figure out what was happening to my body, I took out all supplements and realized almost instantly that the St. John's Wort was to blame for my symptoms.

I've more recently learned that St. John's Wort is not as reliable as I was once led to believe, because as we all know supplements available in retail stores are not well regulated and St. John's Wort can have many unnecessary and unhealthy additives. Also, the main ingredient in St' John's is known to cause many side effects, some of which include the dizziness and headaches.

I am tempted to go as far as to say that my complex migraine was a result of my body not doing well with the St. John's as well. However, only time will tell me if that's true. It is possible that I get another hemiplegic migraine in a week or a month. We will have to wait and see on that one.

Since removing St. John's Wort from my daily life, I have felt instant relief from both the mid day dizziness and the frequent painful headaches. I have felt my energy bounce back up and am thinking much more sharply. I can't tell if I am struggling mentally and emotionally because of the absence of the supplement, or if it was a placebo effect and now I just "feel" like I am struggling. I have moments where I dislike myself very much and continue to tear myself apart for very unreasonable things. However, I feel well equipped to fight those mental struggles, whereas I was not okay living with the dizziness and headaches.

Because of the health scare and constant confusing, however, the beginning of 2016 has felt chaotic. I have felt completely out of balance, as if I am on a tight rope between two sky scrapers and everything is literally about to come crashing down. I have struggled to feel progress with my fitness. I have struggled to find enjoyment from my career. I have struggled to maintain enough energy to keep up with my toddler. And I have struggled to maintain normalcy.

However, I feel as if I am finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. I think I figured out what was causing me to feel so horrible. I am working on my mental outlook on life. I am slowly catching up with tasks at work and at home. And I have recommitted to my fitness process. This last week I have been cutting (calories) and the dietary changes have shown great promise! I am going to continue to trust the process and be consistent and push forward!

The reason I do want to say all of this in a public manner, is so my community sees that everything we put in our bodies matters. We all understand the importance of nutrition and work on clean eating. But then I see lots of women supplement their diets with pills, pre-workouts, protein bars, etc. All of those things are chemicals and the bottom line is we really don't know what those chemicals are or where they are from!

If you work hard to keep your diet clean, why not keep the medications and supplements clean as well? If you are sensitive to food like I am, you will probably be sensitive to any chemical you ingest as well. I am not saying stop what you're doing, but maybe just be aware and really think of which products you are choosing to use.

Things are finally getting better in this Little Life!!

Health Scare.

I've been MIA for too long, am I right? I don't even know if anyone even reads my blog anymore, but I enjoy writing as a way to vent and let my thoughts out of my crazy head, so I am going to keep writing anyway!

So, it was Thursday. It was February 11. I was at work, in the middle of a Spanish 2 class. The kids were working so well and I was trying to file papers into the cabinet. I was trying to tell a student what word to write as a folders label. And it hit me...I could not get the words out! I was having a very hard time thinking of the right words in my head, but when I would finally get a hold of a word, I could not get it to correctly come out of my mouth! I just kept laughing at myself to hide my panic in front of the students.

As my head got foggy and dizzy and I continued to not be able to control my speech or my handwriting, I was getting very nervous. At first I thought I was having a blood sugar crash, so that was an easy fix. Class let out and I went to lunch, had a soda and all my food and waited for things to get better.

Instead, the entire right half of my body went numb. Foot? Numb. Hand? Numb. Cheek? Numb. Tongue? Numb. At this point I wasn't able to hold my cup of water or the food I was trying to eat. My head was spinning and I felt stuck and confused and was beginning to get very scared.

Like I always do, I tried to tough it out. I went back to the next class, but I couldn't even get the correct password typed into my computer. I alerted the principal who offered to watch my afternoon classes while I went home and rested it off.

I got him and told the babysitter I just needed to rest, so I ended up napping for several hours. I still woke up in the evening with a horrible headache and lots of neck stiffness and body aches. I just took it easy all of Thursday night, hanging out with the boys watching TV.

On Friday, my closest friend starts to get me freaked out, saying that what I experienced sounded like a stroke and that I needed to go to the emergency room. We compromised and in the afternoon I took myself to the Urgent Care. The PA suggested some routine blood work and a CT scan, which all came back perfectly clear with a steep price tag. So, we brushed it off a little, thinking I needed to rest more. We went and ate Olive Garden and had some MUCH needed girl time together. I just cannot resist the Lasagna Frita!! Yummmmo!

Now comes Saturday...I am going to tea with my Mom and my sister-in-law at a very cool old castle. Right before we are sitting down to eat, my left foot starts to feel incredibly heavy and almost as if it's not attached to my body. I start to take inventory of what's going on and I have a dull ache in my head again. Over the course of maybe 5 minutes, the entire left side of my body has gone numb. This time I can still talk, but the vertigo was overwhelming. I excused myself from lunch and started balling because I was so scared and the headache that was coming in was horrendous! I spent the entire three hours sleeping in the car while my Mom and sister-in-law had tea and the tour of the castle. 

When they were finished, I asked if we could go to the Emergency Room and we quickly went to the nearest one. The doctor this time really seemed knowledgable and he mentioned that it could be what is a called a vascular headache, since each episode had a bit different symptoms (the right brain controlling the left side of the body, the left brain controlling the right side of the body and the speech). He transferred me to a different Emergency Room to get an MRI done. The second ER was an absolute nightmare and I won't even go into detail of the 6 hours I spent there!!!

We were sent home finally around 11 pm Saturday night and I spent all of Sunday feeling kinda crappy, but slowly coming out of the haze. When I can finally think clearly again, the obsessive side of my personality takes over and I felt this feverish desire to figure out what was wrong with me. I had an appointment set with my General Physician on Thursday, so I just had to survive until then. 

Several friends received chaotic, psychotic text messages throughout the week as my brain ran the entire gamut of possibilities. Here is just a snippet of what I thought could have happened: a mini stroke, a hormonal episode, mercury poisoning from the tuna sandwiches, sensitivity to artificial sweeteners from my coffee, I made it up, alien brain takeover, etc. 

The best thing I did was type "vascular headache" into google and get a somewhat feasible starting point. Thank you very much to the ER doctor that I don't even remember your name.... After searching vascular headache I came to migrainetrust.org and this helped me dig through the types of migraines that people can experience. The only type of migraine that fit the stoke-like symptoms I experienced was hemiplegic migraines. 

I took this term and concern to my doctor and she agrees with the ER doctor that that is the most likely cause of the episode I had at work and at tea with my Mom. Now, I haven't seen a neurologist for an official diagnosis, but my physician said this is a disorder that doesn't have an exact diagnosis anyway. I've found out that I could do some genetic testing, but it isn't verified yet either. Currently, I've been given a prescription for migraine medication to use if I feel the onset of another migraine, I've been given some generic blood tests, and I've been asked to make a few changes to daily life.

The artificial sweeteners are silently killing me, I swear! okay, that's an exaggeration, but they are worse than I thought and I am very sensitive to them. The Blendicano that I enjoy every.single.day is made with one Splenda and Starbucks' Sugar Free Caramel. So, I've changed that by removing the Splenda and using the regular caramel syrup. I also noticed that the Quest Bars and Pure Protein bars that I eat had Aspartame and other artificial sweeteners, so I tossed those. The Celucor protein has a bit of Sucralose in it...but that can was pricey and I just can't waste the money, so I will be finishing that. Today is day 6 without the artificial sweeteners, and a lot of my daily dizziness has gone away. 

 

I was also asked to change the timing of some of the vitamins I take. I changed to taking my St. John's Wort and Magnesium before bed, and only taking the B-12 in the morning. I will keep you updating on how that is changing. My Doctor also recommended a couple other B vitamins to help with migraine prevention and I need to look into that as soon as possible. 

Currently, I am just working on accepting the fact that at any point I could have another migraine, that begins with the symptoms of a stroke. I really hope it doesn't happen again, but most likely it will sometime. I will just need to figure out how to best cope and deal with the migraines in the future. I have considered wearing a medical alert bracelet in case I lose my ability to speak again...but that's for another day. 

For now, I am just trying to relax more and squeeze in some quality time with my boys! Things have been a tiny bit stressful in this Little Life!